We went for a walk tonight - and it was coooooooollld out there. Not the regular kind of cold - but the -10 degrees kind. We get home and my daughter goes into the bathroom and calls to me - "hey Mom, you know how normally when you sit down the seat feels super cold? Well it feels like someone has been sitting on it for a couple of hours". This describing the temperature of the toilet seat relative to the temperature of her butt.
The other one, or actually two - from the same guy on tv - who was in disagreement with his wife over the sale of the million dollar home.
"My wife and I have been together for a long time. As a matter of fact - if I'd killed her when we first met - I'd be done my parole by now."
The second line - again with regard to his wife, "She has a serious case of cranial rectal inversion", which I think is a fancy way of saying she has her head stuck up her ass. It shouldn't have been funny - but somehow - it made me laugh so hard I was choking....
Have a good one, and enjoy the precious few hours left before Monday morning comes.
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